Sound of Surviving Blog

This month is disability pride month. A thing I never knew existed until this year. It feels kind of rebellious in a way, to have a whole month celebrating people with disabilities in a world so centered on ableism. Which is exactly what makes it so important and amazing. For many people, our disability is what makes us who we are. It shapes our personality, our daily life, but also how we see others and the world around us.

So often, people with disabilities are looked at as burdens, or outcasts, because this world wasn’t built for us. I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve gone on interviews where once the employer realizes I’m disabled, their whole demeanor changes, because they automatically assume that disabled means incapable. I can honestly tell you that as someone with a disability, I work so much harder to make sure that I put my all into my job, because I don’t want to be seen as a burden. But so many of us with disabilities have a hidden superpower that employers don’t see: empathy for those around us, and a passion for life.  We empathize with others because we can relate to difficulty and struggles that we’ve faced in our own lives. And we have such a passion to live the life we have, because we’re constantly reminded that we shouldn’t be able to thrive, let alone to live a good life, and that sparks such a fire in our hearts that we want to do all we can to live life to its fullest potential.

But so often, because we live in a world where others around us seem so much more capable, (thanks to ableism), we tend to apologize for needing help, or for needing accommodations to be able to live life the way everyone else does. We’re led to believe that needing accommodations or assistance makes us a burden. Newsflash: It doesn’t. God created and designed us each differently. Not because some of us are better than others, but because he designed us to help us grow into who we’re made to be.

Even now, I struggle with asking others for help, at home, in the community, and in the workplace. I often follow up asking for help with “I’m sorry”, because I feel bad asking for support and I don’t want to seem like a burden. But I recently heard a quote that stated, “It’s a part of human life to need things, and being able to state what we need, makes us the CEO of our own lives.” I’ve found that when I ask for help with things I need, like carrying my 3 bags of supplies into where I volunteer, it doesn’t make me look weak, or needy. It allows me to conserve my energy so that I can do and be my best for the patients I’m working with.

God didn’t design any of us, disabled or not, to do it all; he designed us to lean on him, and to be supported by those around us. “My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”- (Psalm 73:26). No great warrior you read about was ever able to do anything without some kind of support, whether it be from an army, or from a weapon, or God himself; all the great warriors and legends of history needed help of some form to accomplish what they did. Needing help, or more importantly recognizing that we need help, from time to time, doesn’t make us weak. It makes us strong. God didn’t command us to be strong, he commanded us to be bold and courageous. Sometimes courage looks like asking for help, especially when we’re living our life to the fullest, when we’re constantly reminded we shouldn’t be able to.

 So, I will stop apologizing for what I need to live my life to its fullest. And who knows, maybe in seeing me ask for help, someone else will be able to do the same for themselves.